There's More To Life Than Paperwork
by Le Chat Qui Garde La Lune
Summary: When Snape and Lupin teach at an American school as part of an exchange program, they find two girls two be quite besotted with them. How will they handle chaperoning Homecoming, the first formal dance of the year?!


To **_Heather_**, my twin soul, who's idea it was to write this fic.

Disclaimer: Harry Potter characters and references belong to J.K. Rowling, my school district, school, and all other people and personalities mentioned belong to themselves (unfortunetly for me, I could make money! But I'm not...)

A/N: This is only meant in jest, a parody of sorts on Homecoming at my school! 

Since the rise of the Dark Lord earlier that year, some Hogwarts Professors had temporarily moved to a new location, a muggle public school in the United States where Voldemort would hopefully never trace them.

It was there that Snape taught Chemistry, Lupin was in charge of French class

It is there also that we meet Isabelle, Heather, Helle, Leili, Vinayak, Kourtney, Rhett, Brett, Angie, Andy, Matt, Matt, Julia, Ellen, and Becca. 

For anyone who's read my fic Philosophy Discussion Group Goes to Hogwarts just so you know I really do come from there before Chem!

Whew! Ready to start?!?!? 

****

GOOD!

IF YOU HAVE NOT READ THE FORWARD PLEASE DO! IT CONTAINS IMPORTANT INFORMATION CRUCIAL TO THIS STORY

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Isabelle despised Chemistry. It wasn't that her teacher was mean, in fact Mrs. Altfater was very lenient. It was just that all the equations and things were busy work to her. She'd learned most of it in the eighth grade at her old International school in Asia. 

Labs were the most fun. Toxic chemicals and flammable and combustible substances! But Isabelle knew that her class wouldn't get the lab on Monday thus, the feelings of dread and woe. 

Especially coming from her lunch period (spent in Philosophy class) Isabelle always felt ready to drop off to sleep in this class which was very unlike her. She didn't think that this day would be any different. She knew that Mrs. Altfater would be away at Sixth Grade Camp for the entire week, and that in class they would be watching a series of movies. 

But what Isabelle saw when she entered the classroom was unbelievable!

Isabelle's scream resounded through the classroom like an eerie echo. Twenty-four pairs of familiar eyes turned to look at her. She knew all these Junior classmen, most a year or two older than she, but since she was an innocent sophomore, ands most of the others didn't know her, she blushed. Most didn't even know she was alive, since her assigned seat was the last seat in the last row. 

"Is there a problem Miss?" asked a sharp cold voice, with a pair of dark calculating eyes to match. 

Isabelle just looked at the man in astonishment, and gulped. 

"Er- N-No Sir." She stammered, as she silently took her seat.

She certainly wouldn't drop off now! 

The substitute looked exactly like Isabelle imagined Snape from the Harry Potter books to be like. He even had a British accent and everything!

Isabelle took a deep breath and tried to relax. As she opened the note given to her from Heather, one of her best friends, she almost laughed aloud at the words. It read.

__

HAIL THE MOOSE,

__

Hey Belle! I'm in Study Hall and I'm really bored, so I thought I'd write you. 

You know I'd draw art for your fics if you ever finished a bloody one! What's it now? 13- and counting?

Isabelle grinned sheepishly, it was actually around 16, but Heather didn't need to know that. She continued to read.

__

So Homecoming! I guess your not going with Lupin since he has a girlfriend. Wouldn't it be nice for you to go with the real_ Moony!_

That reminds me! I saw a man in the hall that looked just like-

Suddenly the note was snatched away from her. Isabelle turned to glare at the thief, and found that it was the substitute teacher.

Looking the Snape look-alike right in the eyes, Isabelle said,

"May I have it back please, it's mine."

"No you may not. See me after class. And pay attention this time!" he spat at her. 

"Go wash your hair." She muttered the impertinent side of her revealed. 

The mans eyes blazed and he towards his pocket, as if ready to grab hold of a wand, but visibly stopped himself. 

Aha! Isabelle thought. You just dare Snape!

Argh! She was doing it again! This man is not Snape, not Snape, not Sna...he eyes trailed to the white board where the name Professor Epans was written on the board.

Epans- Snape written backwards!

The rest of the lesson crept by. Epans had to have someone work the VCR for him, and he watched the video on metals as if transfixed. Whenever he looked over to scowl at Isabelle she had a ready smirk for him.

Egads, am I turning into Malfoy? She questioned, horrified.

Finally class was over! Isabelle flopped into a desk in the front row. 

"So Professor s'up?" she asked him. He looked puzzled.

"Not used to that phrase at Hogwarts are you Professor Snape? She asked innocently

She was taking a real gamble, if he was just a normal teacher he'd have her in a straight-jacket locked up somewhere and taking little orange and white pills (which I take already btw!) by the morrow. 

The man, Epans or Snape, just stood there wide eyed, but not denying anything. Isabelle, fearing that he would soon come to his senses and modify her memory, said

"Well, if you've got nothing to say to me then!" and bolted out of the classroom.

Even having stayed late to "talk" to Professor Snape or Epans as it may be, Isabelle was the first one to reach the French classroom, only a flight of stairs above her Chemistry class. What she saw there made her heart skip a beat. (lol if you've read my poem...k I'll stop with the references...maybe) 

And she screamed for the second time in two hours. It was a Professor Lupin look-alike!

That was it, she fainted.

"Here have some chocolate!" A kind voice with a British accent met Isabelle's ears.

Taking a deep breath Isabelle forced her eyes open, and took the chocolate from the man. 

"Er- thanks." She told him, her voice wobbly.

"Sure, anytime, I would have taken you to the infirmary, but I'm sort of new here and I don't know where it is."

"That's ok, I'll manage just fine." She said, though appreciative of his concern. 

She might have sort of a thing for Snape from the HP books, but Lupin was definitely one guy she had fallen for, hard, even if she had been thirteen at the time.

My name's Professor Loperlun. The Lupin-looking man said, said, smiling at her.

Isabelle smiled back at him. It was ironic that the guy she had liked in this class all year she secretly called Lupin, and now their Professor really was Lupin! Or at least his long-lost twin. (A/N: Romulus?)

"Oh!" She had been so concentrated in sorting this mess out she had forgotten to introduce herself. 

"My name's Isabelle." She said looking around her. By now there were other people streaming into the room, all giving her curious looks.

At least they all knew who she was. Here she was called "The French Girl" and the Juniors and Seniors pretty much ignored her unless they wanted help on their homework, or current French project.

She might be wrong about this Professor though. Even though he had a trace of a British accent he had explained that there were some teachers- a Chemistry, math, French, and History teacher who had come to England either to sub, or on an exchange program. His name only shared the first letter with Lupin's though. He introduced himself as Professor Loperlun.

Isabelle breezed through the French exercises not paying them much attention. She was trying to figure out his name. It must have something to do with it. What did she know about Lupin. She made a list on the back of her French notes.

RJL: 

Werewolf

Boggart- Moon

Wadiwasi!- Gum spell, Peeves, Dean.

MWP(P), L/J....

Order of Phoenix (?)

Knows S. is innocent. 

That was as far as she got. When the break bell rang, Isabelle raced out the door to find Heather. 

She sidetracked Heather on her way to maths and told her the entire story. At first she was incredulous but when she stopped in the doorway of Isabelle's French room and got a good look at the Lupin guy, she sobered up pretty quickly. 

The Second half of French Isabelle didn't even try to listen to what was going on. She just fiddled with Professor Loperlun's name.

With four minutes left she finally translated it. Having added to letters and making appropriate spaces...

Professor Loperlun, Professor Loup Peur Lune! Roughly translated from French it meant Professor Wolf Afraid of Moon! It all fit! 

Her poor Remus! Unlike her run-in with Snape however, Isabelle did not try and confront Lupin. She couldn't risk two grown men trying to tun after her trying to modify her memory, instead she just smiled sadly at him and headed out the door. 

Hmm, I think I'll stop there for now...(:

TTYL...hopefully! 


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